Episode 6- Krampus and the Spoon Licker: Creepy Christmas Lore

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, Strange Woods walkers! This is a special holiday episode where we discuss the kooky and spooky lore and legends that are part of Christmas. Strap in and get ready to get slayed...sleighed...?

STOP! INSIDE JOKES AHEAD! If you haven’t gotten to listen to the episode yet, spoiler alert! This post contains lots of stuff that will make waaay more sense if you listen to the episode before or while reading. So if you haven’t already, pump the brakes and listen to the episode or just click above to play so that you can be in on all the shenanigans to follow!

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Produced by Peter Woodward

Merry Merry, Everybody!

It’s the Christmas season and we just don’t feel right about not gifting our listeners with something special in light of the holidays. So here we go…let’s talk about some real messed up Christmas legends, and ask the burning question: why does Europe hate their children so much?

LISTENER STORY ALERT!!

Shout out to our latest listener tale from Raemi, and her creepy hospital story. Haunted electronics picking up potentially lethal heart rhythms on a patient who isn’t there…spppoooooookkyyyyy!

Here’s a look at the rhythm she talked about in case that fascinates you.

All right! Let's get into creepy Christmas...

Knecht Ruprecht...hobo with a stick

Knecht Ruprecht, otherwise known as Farmhand Rupert, is a buddy of Saint Nicholas that doles out beatings to bad kids at Christmas. Apparently, the ability and/or willingness to pray was what decided what you get from him. He gives nuts and fruits to the kids who pray willingly and well. An honest effort or mediocre job yielded moderate or just regular bummer stuff like coal. No effort at all…he beats you with sticks. Yikes.

Wanna read more about that?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Knecht_Ruprecht

Gr'yla, the Christmas Witch

Gryla whose name loosely translates to “growler” is a giant mountain ogress who cooks children in a stew. And mama likes her snacks. She eats ALOTTA kids, bruh. One legend states she has 15 tails, each holding 100 balloons with each balloon containing 20 children at a time. (burp)

She’s also a family woman, said to be the mother of the 13 Yule Lads that wreak havoc around the holidays in Iceland. These winners have all kinds of fun tales associated with them: licking spoons, slamming doors, stealing sausages, harassing sheep…you know, normal stuff. Seriously, take some time to read about these dudes on the picture below. Hilarious.

Here’s some info about that!

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/why-icelands-christmas-witch-much-cooler-and-scarier-krampus-180967605/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Icelandic_Christmas_folklore

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/meet-the-thirteen-yule-lads-icelands-own-mischievous-santa-clauses-180948162/

Elf on the Shelf...agent of chaos

This creepy little dude. He originates from the creator’s real life experience with her own family’s elf that she had as a child. Look at those eyes. Where does he really come from? And who is he? Fairy? Fae? Keebler? The world may never know…

Perchta...fear her

Meet Perchta, everybody. Her name means “the bright one” and she is one of the guardian of the beasts appearing during the twelve days of Christmas. She was said to have two forms: a beautiful woman in white robes and a decrepit old crone. She was also rocking one large foot which was an indication of her ability to shape shift. Apparently she knew if the kids and servants had been naughty or nice all year and would either reward the good ones with silver coins or disembowel the bad ones and stuff them with pebbles and straw.

Some mo’ info.

https://boroughsofthedead.com/frau-perchta/

Belle's Nipples...heehee

Belsnickel is a hairy, fur-coat-wearing, bearded grump who taps on doors and windows of childrens’ homes during the Christmas season to dole out punishment or give treats depending on how the kids have behaved. This lore is of German descent and consequently is very prevalent in Pennsylvania Dutch tradition. His name comes from belz meaning “fur” or “hides” and Nickel meaning “little Nicholas”.

Here’s the video we were watching and laughing at: it’s from The Office and features Dwight proudly portraying the Belsnickel.

Krampus: bad cop to Santa's good cop or the literal Christmas devil?

Horns. Hooves. Holy crap. Meet this horror show called Krampus, from the German word krampen meaning “claw”. Originating in Austria and Germany, his visit comes December 5 and he is said to either beat the bad children with birch sticks or just take them straight to hell. In Austrian legend, he was even accompanied by a “band of ill-tempered elves” called perchten that helped him punish naughty kids.

The yearly Krampus festivals in Austria and Munich have some unbelievable masks, costumes, and events. There’s even a Krampus Run that is said to rival the Running of the Bulls in Pamplona for its excitement!